Sunday, November 12, 2006

Scoop

K-Fed has a Britney sex tape that he's holding ransom. He's already been offered $50 million for it, but he's willing to be a good guy and let it go for a little less for Britney.

Britney Spears wants to give away pictures of her second son instead of selling them. She wants to make sure Kevin gets as little money from her as possible, and seeing how he was seen buying undies in Walmart, I'd say she's doing a good job.. She wanted to do a shoot with the baby in Vogue, but they turned her down. Ouch. Meanwhile, Britney's first ex, Jason Alexander, says he still loves her.

Here's an interesting stat: before her marriage to Kevin, Britney was worth $100 million. Now it's closer to $50 million. Who would've thought being married to a pothead could use up your cash so quickly.


Did Lindsay Lohan call Paris Hilton a naughty four-letter word the other day?






Must be nice: Anna Nicole Smith is one of the hottest election year issues in the Bahamas.


That "Denise Richards Throws Laptops from Balcony" story just got a little less cool. Turns out, a laptop didn't hit the 80-year-old woman in a wheelchair, it just landed dangerously close. And she only threw one laptop, not two.


Jack Palance died Friday. I enjoyed him.





"Hand me your keys...I'm Dennis Rodman" - Dennis Rodman, preventing some guy from drinking and driving. How messed up do you have to be to have Dennis Rodman stop you from driving?


From TMZ.com: Jennifer Aniston's house is being fumigated. She wouldn't mind the fleas and lice too much, if they didn't remind her so much of Brad.


"You should see my kickass ball pit."


American Idol's biggest moron, Kellie Pickler, is getting her own show on Fox about "a naïve small-town Southern girl" who discovers that her biological father is the state's governor. Fox just always seems to manage to come up with the worst sitcom ideas.

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Thursday, November 09, 2006

Show notebook

Ed Bradley from 60 Minutes died of leukemia today. Not even Mike Wallace knew anything about Ed's leukemia.

I really liked Ed Bradley, so I feel bad making a joke already.

But you have to listen to Mike Wallace talk about Ed's mom to CNN.

Very odd


"What did Wallace say about my mom?"


Maybe you shouldn't feel bad about K-Fed getting divorced through text message. Turns out, he's been talking divorce with his own lawyer for the last month. There are even rumors he'll exploit his children to get more cash out of Britney. A "give me some more money, and I won't fight you for the kids" type of thing. If only she could hold his bong hostage in some similar fashion.


K-Fed's first baby mama is finally commenting on his current divorce. She says Kevin is "such a nice guy." Her facial expression says otherwise.




At his crappy House of Blues performance in Chicago, Kevin was making sure everyone in the audience knew he was a free man. Oh no, Keven the out-of-the-closet bachelor has been born.

You can bid on a rent check from Kevin Federline's life before Britney, with the words "insufficient funds" stamped on it. I don't know if I'd fork out the cash for that now...I hear supply is about to go about on this piece of memorabilia.

You can also buy Kevin a pair of shoes. He was being followed by the paparazzi in a sporting goods store Monday night. He asked one of them if they would pay for some shoes for him. And my how they spoil their boy, he got a $120 pair.


Denise Richards was getting annoyed by the paparazzi in Vancouver, so she somehow got a hold of their laptops and threw them off a hotel balcony. One of them hit an 80-year-old lady in the arm. Only minor injuries. Although you know that old woman's going to never stop complaining about that bruise.


Daniel, one of the more worthless Baldwins, has been arrested for stealing a car. It sounds like it may have been a misunderstanding, where Daniel was extremely strung out and not realizing he needed to ask permission to borrow someone's car for a couple days.


Paris Hilton went on a $7 thousand shopping binge last week. Taking a cue from Nicole Richie, she then tried to flush all the clothes down the toilet.

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Rumsfeld's Speech

I'm writing this as Donald is giving his Landon Lecture at K-State.


Ever wonder why we applaud people for not getting divorced or for being alive to be married for a certain number of years? Why is that?

Applauding Rumsfeld's marriage skills.


Obviously, this speech came at an odd time, what with his being fired Wednesday. Rummy's doing a good job in this appearance so far. He's usually pretty entertaining to watch, and you do feel a little bad for him.

Rums describes how good he did publicizing this speech.


Rummy seems to be having a hard time hearing/understanding the questions from the audience so far.

Listen to this mass confusion.


If you remember, when Bush was in town, someone asked if he'd seen Brokeback Mountain.

Listen to this guy fall flat on his face trying to reference that moment.


Uh oh, the Chinese language instructor has two questions she'll struggle to get through.

Boring question #1

Boring and really ridiculous question #2


Okay, now something weird has happened. Right toward the end of his speech, the video goes to some reporter outside Bramlage. She's standing there, obviously not knowing she's live.

Here's the mic check.

Now, the camera is just staring at her for another silent minute.

Now she's talking to some K-State student who "saw the speech." Wait a minute, I'm watching the speech live, and I get cut off by a close-up of this reporter who's talking to some student who "saw the speech." The speech is still obviously going on, and this student's remarks couldn't be any more generic. Scandal on "Kansas NOW 22!"

Take a listen

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